A few years ago, my father-in-law moved in with my husband and me. Now, it could’ve been a lot harder than it was. He is a kind, easy-going, quiet man, so he wasn’t particularly difficult to live with. And I don’t have children, so I wasn’t suddenly in the “sandwich” between parents and kids. But my husband and I do have a very small, 1930s Ann Arbor house, with only one bathroom, and we were suddenly faced with a lot of elder care that neither one of us was expecting. Plus, I work at home, so my work space and the solitude I need as a writer were compromised by my father-in-law’s full-time presence.
In other words, I wasn’t exactly a happy camper. And since I’m generally a pretty happy gal, this was a new experience for me.
I remember well when I started unloading on my friends at the Ann Arbor City Club. Because it seemed like every time I was at the City Club, I was unloading on somebody—the people in my poetry group, the women in my book club, the friends I met for lunch. For the six months it took to move my father-in-law into his own place, I needed somewhere to talk about what I was going through—what I was feeling, what I was learning, how things were going.
And you know what? My City Club friends were with me every step of the way. Not only did they give me good advice and lots of supportive hugs, but they encouraged me to unload on them, so I could go home in the right frame of mind for my family responsibilities. The City Club was the home-away-from-home I needed at a critical time. And the people I know there were just exactly the kind of experienced, encouraging, patient friends anyone could want during one of life’s tough transitions.
In the end, we found my father-in-law a great place to live, not far from us, with the services he needs. He made new friends at his new place, and he is happier than he’s ever been. And sometimes he even comes with us to the City Club for a dinner party.
This blog is about friendship at the Ann Arbor City Club. My story is just one of many stories of the transformative power of community. Check back here for more such stories. And check out the City Club website if you want to know more about this very special place.
About the author of today’s post: Stephanie Kadel Taras, Ph.D., has been a member of the Ann Arbor City Club for 14 years. She is a professional writer and personal biographer with her own company, TimePieces Personal Biographies.